How to tell that your child is already addicted, not “just fooling around”
The first broadcast in a series about addiction in New York’s Russian-speaking community. Viacheslav Sviadish talks about who is at risk, the danger of “legal” weed of unknown quality, which signs should alert parents, and why help is needed not only by the person with addiction but by the whole family.
“Vremya Ch” radio show, Radio Freedom FM 104.7 (New York)
Videos are in Russian. Turn on subtitles (CC) → Settings → Auto-translate → English.
Timestamps
Key points in a minute
- Addiction affects more than the person himself: it has a cost for the family and for the whole neighborhood.
- Both children from low-income families, where parents work a lot, and children from well-off families are at risk — gifts don’t replace communication.
- According to Viacheslav, you can buy anything in “legal” stores, including synthetics: there’s almost no quality control there of the kind there is for alcohol.
- The line isn’t drawn by the substance but by the purpose: medication prescribed by a doctor is treatment, while seeking drugs “for the high” is already addiction.
- The main signal for parents is a noticeable change in behavior: isolation, a closed door, withdrawal from communication and old friends, irritability, aggression.
- There’s no ready-made solution “for everyone”: to give advice, you need to understand the specific situation.
- Addiction is a chronic illness the whole family “suffers from,” so loved ones need help too.
Summary
Why this project
The broadcast opens a new series of programs about addiction. The host stresses that the project is nonprofit: it’s free help for Russian-speaking residents — both for those who use and for their relatives. For the neighborhood, addiction also has a social cost: theft, people on the streets, a low standard of living.
Viacheslav says he has worked with addiction for 26 years in international projects — not only in rehab but also in bringing people back to normal life: education, work, social status. Short-term treatment is only the beginning; what matters is that the person gains values and something to lean on. The plan is to start the project in Brooklyn and then possibly expand it to other states.
Who is at risk
The host asks whether Brooklyn has its own specifics. Viacheslav replies that, statistically, people from vulnerable social groups are more at risk: families who have recently arrived, where parents work a lot and don’t have time for their children.
But children in well-off families become addicted too. The host describes a familiar scenario: both parents are completely absorbed in work, and instead of communication there’s a new phone or a car, in the hope that the child will appreciate it. Viacheslav agrees that substances today are available “on every corner” and have become an almost ordinary part of life for many teenagers.
“Legal” doesn’t mean safe
A separate topic is the legalization of marijuana. According to Viacheslav, legal stores may sell synthetics and who knows what else. At a liquor store the chance of buying a fake is minimal — regulators monitor the quality of alcohol. With cannabis, in his assessment, there is practically no such control, and a person who is sure he’s buying a “legal product” may end up with anything.
The consequences are abnormal behavior, psychoses of various kinds, and aggression in which a person is capable of harming others. Viacheslav links this to the fact that teenagers have a lot of free time and there is almost no prevention work.
Where the line is: treatment or the “high”
The host notes that Viacheslav doesn’t say “drugs” but “chemical substances.” He explains: this includes alcohol and medications that are dispensed legally but act like narcotics.
The line is the purpose. If a doctor prescribed a medication and the person really needs it, that’s treatment. If a person goes to a doctor to get medications for the “high,” that’s already addiction. From the outside, the doctor can’t always see this, so there are many such cases.
“Just fooling around” or already addicted
The host asks the main question: how can a mom or dad tell whether a teenager (or an already adult son) is just fooling around — “like everyone, had a puff of something” — or whether it’s already addiction? And where is the line between drinking with friends and a problem?
Viacheslav honestly says that it’s hard for someone without experience to determine this precisely; it takes time. But the simplest guide is a departure from usual behavior: isolation, withdrawal from communication, irritability, impatience, aggression. The child locks himself in his room, avoids contact, avoids his parents, drops his former crowd and old friends. If there are such changes, it’s worth seeking a consultation: based on the symptoms you describe, a specialist will help you understand what’s going on — though no one can give a 100% answer remotely.
The whole family is ill
At the end, Viacheslav talks about codependency. When someone in the family uses, everyone ends up at the “epicenter” — like a virus in the house: first one person gets sick, then the others. Addiction is a chronic illness, and the family suffers along with the person, physically and emotionally.
That’s why everyone needs help. To help a loved one, the family has to change its own habitual “algorithms”: not be ashamed, ask for advice, understand what to do — both for their own sake and for his. Without this, it’s very hard to move forward.
The summary is based on the recording and retells the main ideas in our own words. The video reflects the author's personal experience and views; it is not medical advice. Viacheslav Sviadish is an addiction recovery specialist, not a doctor.
Frequently asked questions
How can I tell that a teenager is already addicted and not just trying things?
Look at behavior: isolation, a closed door, withdrawal from communication and old friends, irritability and aggression, avoiding parents. One sign alone doesn’t prove anything, but if the changes are noticeable and persist, it’s worth consulting a specialist.
If marijuana is legal, does that mean it’s safe?
No. Legality guarantees neither quality nor safety. Use can lead to abnormal behavior and psychoses, especially in teenagers.
The medication was prescribed by a doctor — is that addiction too?
If the medication is truly needed for treatment and taken as prescribed — no. A warning sign is when a person seeks medication not for treatment but for the effect. In that case, it’s better to discuss the situation with a doctor.
Why do parents need help if it’s the child who uses?
Addiction affects the whole family. Until loved ones understand what to do and how to behave, it’s hard for them to help both themselves and him.
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